Embarrassment About Sex

Is Sex Embarrassing?

I am a teenager and a lot less open about sex than my peers. It might be strange, but I try to think about what it’d be like for me to have sex. I think I’d make embarrassing sounds and faces and that embarrasses me. I’m insecure in my body, so that also plays a role. Is it normal to feel this way? Continue reading “Embarrassment About Sex”

My Planned Parenthood Story

I stand with Planned ParenthoodI went to Planned Parenthood for the first time fairly recently. I had possibly been exposed to sexually transmitted infections and I could get in there more quickly than I could get in to see my doctor. Also, money was an issue and I wasn’t sure how much of the testing my insurance company was going to pay for (some of those tests can be expensive and my insurance at the time paid what seems like random percentages of tests.) I was treated with great respect, compassion and no judgement. I got a lot of additional information about my sexual health.

Although I had been going to the neurologist and marking off the checkbox that says I have incontinence for years (thanks seizures!), the nurse practitioner I saw at Planned Parenthood was the first health care provider to actually address the issue as something to more than glide over or as an inevitability. She told me about pelvic floor physical therapy and that there are a number of excellent providers in the area who could probably help me. Although I wasn’t ready to look into it at the time, I have since and it has made a huge difference in my life.

That visit to Planned Parenthood also helped me realize that my relationship was not as emotionally safe as it needed to be and gave me the strength to stand up to my partner and demand more.

Planned Parenthood gave me basic healthcare and safety in an affordable and timely manner. The fact that our government is trying to take that away from our citizens is frankly rather disgusting.

Depression Before Period

Why do I get so unbearably depressed before my period?
I will think about everything in my life up unto this point about what I have & haven’t achieved & weigh them out and the latter will be much more to me. I self-loathe all day & feel like the rest of my life will be horrible. I start to feel like I want to die. How can I stop feeling this way?
Continue reading “Depression Before Period”

Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy Part Two

My second pelvic floor PT session started with my therapist and I going over my bladder log and talking about the prior week. By the way, I should mention that they know what I do and has consented to my blogging my therapy. Basically, I do not drink anywhere near enough. They told me that my bladder would be happier with me drinking more coffee and sparkling water than the amount of liquids I have been drinking, which woo hoo! Because, I love coffee. (I have just started tapering onto a medication that is supposed to make people not love coffee and it does not seem to be impacting me that way at all!) Continue reading “Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy Part Two”

Dating With Light Bladder Leaks

This is basically pelvic floor physical therapy post two and a half.

Light bladder leaks is the current euphemism for wetting yourself or incontinence. I am not sure what the difference between a light bladder leak and a heavy bladder leak is. I do not think I have actually heard the term heavy bladder leak. Anyway, I have seizures, sometimes I pee myself with or immediately after said seizures. I don’t want to be dragging around a change of clothes at all times, so I wear a pad. This means that yes, I’m probably wearing a pad on dates. I used to get all nervous about the possibility of having seizures during sex (and yes during dates), I’ve mentioned that before. But when I started needing to wear pads regularly I had to deal with that as well. At first, I tried to hide it, taking them off as soon as I thought something sexy was likely to happen. That was kind of distracting though, because I’d have to make my exit to the bathroom when things maybe got unexpectedly hot and heavy. I had one partner that I wasn’t really comfortable talking to it about it, because it didn’t go well when I started to broach the issue, and I realized that that was part of his problem with periods. And that really the whole thing was his problem. (Also, probably a clue that maybe not the right guy for me.) (Bladder leak pads are basically, if not entirely, the same pads if you have girl parts – you can buy them with extra absorbability in different sections of the pad but I’m not sure how this helps, otherwise they just have different labels and prices.) Continue reading “Dating With Light Bladder Leaks”